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- 5 things professional athletes are allowed to do that you can’t
- When a refugee reviews Hungary on Yelp …
- A memo to the Baltimore Police Department: My brother is on the loose!
- Christopher Columbus tries to convince the Lil’ General to support his voyage
- An idea for any young adult who complains of boredom: Go fuck yourself
- In the vegetables [Obvious]
- "Statistics, there are 700-800 people in America that find black widows in their grapes every year," NOPE. Subby will now only consume grapes that have been mashed, fermented, and bottled [Scary]
- Department of Justice wants Georgia police department to return the $70K in seized drug money that it used to buy a Hellcat. "You have to be more careful with the money we take from citizens" [Murica]
- Soap Box Derby world champion drives a better car than you do, and he's starting eighth grade in the fall [Cool]
- Because sometimes you just need hundreds of golden retrievers to make you feel better [Sappy]